a crisis of identity

A Crisis of Identity

Some of the most stuck people I meet are those who cannot let go of who they were and accept where they are now.

They were brave riders, able to ride anything, even doing track work.....

They have an identity that is deeply connected to being a talented equestrian, not someone who is struggling with a horse, feeling lost and vulnerable when they ride.

And it is this identity crisis that can be the biggest roadblock to accepting the current situation they find themselves in.

The inability to recognize that they are out of their depth, the need to take a step back, learn new things, and accept that their confidence has taken a hit, will take its toll.

The more frustrated they become, the greater the divide in their sense of self, and the more they resist the situation.

The reality is, we never stay in the same place. A skill or ability is never set in stone; it is fluid. It's either growing, shrinking, or facing challenges.

The ability to competently and reliably influence a horse is complex, and it will never remain static.

Life will present you with different horses, each of which will require a unique approach.

Being alive means you are constantly evolving.

Responsibility changes you (ask any woman about the transformation upon becoming a mother), age changes you, and factors like fitness, strength, and health are in a constant state of flux. All these factors influence your sense of vulnerability and your perception of risk.

Then there's time: the more rides you experience in life, the more chances something unforeseen can occur. Your mind will constantly recalibrate what's considered safe and what's not.

All these elements shape you.

If you don't embrace the relentless forces of change, you'll find yourself stuck.

Life doesn't allow you to remain 17 forever.

But it does offer opportunities to be as accomplished as you aspire to be, provided you let go of preconceived notions of who you think you should be. Accept that life is about rising to challenges and learning from the lessons that horses present to us.